Self Esteem: We Can’t Be Doin’ That

Rhonda: Hey guys, it’s Rhonda with Kentucky SPIN. I hope you all are doing well. I want to talk today about self-esteem. And I want to be very honest with you, it’s one area that I have struggled throughout my life. And I know many others have, and many of our children, family members, friends. And I just want to take a moment so we can kind of share with one another.

[00:00:23]One of the things, too, that I have found is because I am very critical of myself and I always see what I haven’t got done or I didn’t do or I didn’t do the best at. So we’ve got to really work together and change our mind to where we look at, “okay. But I did get this done and I did do that.” Because many times, and I saw a quote, I’ve seen it many times, and I’m not sure who it was from, but sometimes one of the most dangerous things is our thoughts in our mind and how we judge ourselves. So I wanted to see if we couldn’t all make ourselves a promise. And I love the shirt. You know, it was a fundraiser for the state of Kentucky, the governor Beshear.

[00:01:08] So I want us to make one another a promise. Is that anytime that we start to talk negative about ourself, in our mind, or out loud to others is we tell ourselves “we can’t be doing that”. You can say it out loud. You can say it in your mind, but I’m going to hold you to the promise, cause I’m going to do it too.

[00:01:26] And it’s hard, but we have to train our mind, because we deserve to be valued and respected just as we do everyone else. But we can’t hold them to that until we value and respect ourselves. And yes, there are going to be people who take advantage of us throughout our life, especially if you are a giver and a doer.

[00:01:47]That’s just how life is. And it, you know, they may be dealing with their own issues and it has really nothing to do with you, but a lot of times we judge their actions based on it had to be something about us. That’s not the case. And I don’t know with age is bringing me, hopefully some new wisdom about things, but you know, I want each of us to make a promise to one another because we need to respect and value ourselves just as we do others. We deserve that. And anytime you doubt yourself, remind yourself we can’t be doing that. Because where there’s a will, there’s a way. And yes, it may not look like what everybody else does, but you can still get things done. And you are going to have bad days and you’re gonna have good days.

[00:02:35] But what I want us to do is to start having conversations with one another, because again, our mental health is just as important as our physical health. And this can vary dependent upon, and you know, there are things, and different traumas that I may have had when I was younger. All of us may have experienced different things.

[00:02:53] What I think is traumatic, may not be what you think is traumatic. But it does shape who we are. And just because we may have lived through certain things does not mean that we do not deserve better or that that is actually a true picture of who we are. Because it’s not. You have great things ahead of you, and I want us to always make the promise with one another.

[00:03:16] When you have the negative talk, when you doubt yourself, if someone is being detrimental to you, I want you to think “we can’t be doing that”. I have come to a point in my life, which I’m still obviously going to be a work in progress, but I get to a point I take a lot, I really do, and some things that maybe I shouldn’t at all in how I’m treated. But I get to what’s called the done-done part, and then I’m done. Sometimes we have to get to that point to where we see, okay, no, no, no, no. This is not healthy for me. And everybody is at different points on their journey. So,  let’s also remember that. So I want you to stay safe and healthy and know that we love you and are here.

[00:04:01] And remember. We can’t be doing that negative talk to ourselves. We can accomplish great things and I want you to remember that and take care and have a wonderful day.